“Do you love my insides? The parts you can't see?”

Hmm, 2009, you're over two weeks old now. Maybe you should actually do something? Stop being mean to me, maybe? Common, I'm sticking to my resolutions, I haven't killed anyone and I'm trying really hard to be optimistic but it would help a lot if something nice happened for a change. I'm not asking you for anything big like winning the lottery, (I wont complain if I do though!!! *hint hint*) even some one saying something nice to me, a song to make me smile, a coupon for free cake, heck - at this point even one of my friends saying thank you honestly will make me ecstatic!

- How sad is that, that kind words I used to take for granted from people I love, are the things I want to hear the most, and no one is saying them? A nice, simple, "hey, how are you? oh well, remember I'm always here for you, I love you and don't be to hard on yourself! something will come along soon."

But nope.

And when is soon coming? Months and months of waiting, so I got sick of waiting. Waiting wasn't enough, so I got out there. I gave my resume in person, I went after jobs. Still, soon isn't here.

And I am sick of not being in love. I could have a boyfriend, but I don't love him. I don't like him like that, it would be mean and cruel to him to date him and dump him, he's a good guy and a great friend. What do I have to do to find love? I'll do it, I just don't know what I'm missing.

What do people usually wish for? Happiness? I'm not happy. Wealth? I'm not poor (thank god for savings), but I'm unemployed. Love? Hahahahaaa, I don't even know what that means.

So, booo 2009. This is not a good way to start out! Just, I need just one little thing to be happy about so I can rearrange my brain and become optimistic.

/emo

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Fandom: Reborn
Title: Love and Violence
Pairing: None
Rating: PG
Warnings: Random changes in tense.
Summary: Tsuna. 10 drabbles about him, his life and his thoughts.
Note: Story title and a couple of lines stolen from
"L'Amour et La Violence", by Sebastien Teller translated into English.

( dis moi ce que tu penses j'aime aussi l'amour et la violence... )

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So, I'm leaving the country! I'm really excited, it's going to be so much fun. My flight was delayed, so now I actually have time to go and check all my emails, read all my updates and relax. I'll be gone for 30 days which - in reality - isn't all that long, but it's the first time I've ever been away from home, the first time I've ever left Canada.

No computer, no familiar bed or pillows or people.

Instead, I'm trading all that for a short little while of fun and excitement and adventure. New things, new people and new places. I will most likely get lost and confused and probably scared shitless. But -- it should be fun.


So, Europe, here I come!


... when ever my flight arrives.



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Fandom: Reborn
Title: Inert
Pairing: None
Rating: PG
Word Count: 600+
Warnings: Implied character death, if you want to read the ending that way. Not crack :(
Summary: There were very few things scarier than Tsuna pissed off. Drabble.
Authors Notes: Well, I wanted to write Tsuna mad, and then I needed a reason for him to be mad, and then this happened. Wildly OOC - and not in a fun way.


--
( Gokudera watched on from his position on the floor )

Title: Karma Police
Rating: G
Word count: 1520
Summary: Sometimes there's an itch that just doesn't go away.

--
( There was an itch... )

--

I'm so hyper right now, it's ridiculous. All my friends are about ready to kill me because of how much of a spaz I'm acting like right now. It's their fault for convincing me to drink more than one cup of coffee in the span of an hour.

I have a blister on the finger tip of my middle finger because the scroll thingy on my mouse and because of how hard I've been gripping my pencils and pens in the last few days. Luckily the blisters on my heels have healed since I last tried to break in the super cute flats I have.

I'd go read some manga to cure my boredom, but I'm completely caught up in all the series I'm interested in right now after going on an anime/manga marathon. I could work on my christmas_cacti assignment but I don't want to ruin it in my hyper-state.

I need to go do something active. Hopefully no one will look at me too weirdly when I start to wash the floors at 9:35 at night.

--

--

So, I was supposed to clean today. Instead I decided to play around with my layout here. I really like it, but I should have vacuumed. Oh well.

The header is from a Bleach DJ "Roulinsou" which I got from here.

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I made peanut butter cookies! I ate way too many though, it was a batch of about 40 and I ate half of them in around 15 minutes. They were so good.

I need to start baking again. I have all these ingredients and recipes but I never use them. The thing is I'm way to impatient to cook, so I always have to have someone there to entertain me. Silly easily distracted me. The only reason I was able to make all those cookies was because I was listening to Mindless Self Indulgence really loudly and dancing around the kitchen.

I love dancing. I kinda have no rhythm so I suck at it. It's pretty fun just to let loose and hop around without a care. I do the same thing with singing. My music is always the loudest when I'm singing so that I don't embarrass myself. I need some more songs that I can sing to. I have over 2500 different songs on my computer and various CDs, but it's never enough. I'm greedy like that.

It's been a weird week. Every time I talk to my brother, he is grumpy. We used to talk a lot, either by texting or MSN, but now I only talk to him once a week and thats basically just him bitching about work. I miss him.

I also miss my friends. I haven't seen anyone outside of my "group" in around 4 months. I need to get into contact again with some of them, see what their lives are like now. And then there are the friends I see too much of. My BFF is in dire need of my advice about his love life. Every night I come home to my email filled with frantic messages about what he should do with his girl of choice (which changes ever couple of weeks). I'm happy that he's willing to talk to me about these things but my god, stick with one bloody girl and you'll have less problems!

But in other news, I've started to watch Zombie Loan. It's pretty good.


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--

I hate, hate, hate the heat. >.<

It's so hot, it feels like 32C and I hate it. It's been like this all week, and it's going to be like this all next week too. I feel like I'm melting. I hate sweat so much but in this weather there is nothing I can do to stop it really.

I look like a mess too. The humidity is going straight to my hair. It's all puffy and curly and frizzy, and because it's so thick I have to keep it up and off of my neck which gives me headaches but cools me down a bit. I haven't really had a bad sunburn yet, I've been layering myself with spf 50, which is good for my poor pale skin, but makes me look so greasy and shiny. I'm happy that all my freckles have come out though. I have so many of them on my chest, shoulders and face he he.

I just want to curl up in someplace cool and sleep.

Buuut! This weekend I'm going camping with 10 of my good friends that I haven't spoken to in ages. It's going to be fun, as long as everyone can avoid drama and not be such sticks in the mud *sigh* And I'll be gone when HP7 comes into stores, which means I wont get my hands on the book until Monday. But this time I've been good, and haven't sought out spoilers like I usually do.

I'm going to be sad when the series is over. If it wasn't for those Harry Potter books, I don't think I would have ever got into reading.

--

--

It's my birthday!

I went out to dinner with the girls a few nights ago and it was fun. I felt a bit bad for our waiter though, we were tipsy and giggled at every little thing. My friends left him a nice little tip so it evened out.

I also saw 1408 last night. Such a good movie. I don't usually like scary movies but this was really creepy and I just loved it. I love having friends who work in movie theaters, I got free drinks and popcorn and a free movie! **loves my friends so much**

And, now I get to go and get my hair cut by an actual stylist! My brothers girlfriend has all these nice connections so I get to be spoiled.

I hate growing old and I hate birthdays even though I always get good things and usually have a fun time. But what can you do?

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--

Title: The Ex
Author: kissestohold
Character: Takashi  Kawamura
Rating: G
Word Count: 686 words
Summary: Taka-san and the changes in his life when he gave up tennis. Slight angst, no pairings.
Authors Note: ... Well, I have no idea where this came from.



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Comments are love!

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Ahh, I hate the summer.

It's way too hot (even though it's only 26C) I went out for some bubble tea and I must have forgotten to put sunscreen on my one arm, because it's burnt. Only one arm. >.<

My skin is so pale, this sun is not good for it. I was only outside for thirty minutes.

Oh well, only three more months then it's fall again!

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Made by angelofsnow

Title: Rise
Author: kissestohold
Pairing: Tezuka/Fuji
Rating: G
Word Count: 873
Summary: Little snippets of Fuji’s life.
Authors Notes: I’m really happy with this but I’m not sure if I made some things a little too subtle and others too obvious. I hope I managed to keep Fuji in character. Comments and advice are appreciated!

( Read more... )

Well, Life is boring, so I drink coffee and drabble?
If my life wasn't so boring then I might actually post about it, but whatever.


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( There was a strange sort of comfort... )

Title: Leaves
Author: kissestohold
Rating: G
Word count: 565
Summary: Original drabble about a tree and a girl
Authors’ Notes: Hmm, well I wrote this back in June and it was just sitting on my hard drive, so I decided to upload it. There’s a lot of work that can be done to improve it, but I have no idea, so if anyone has any suggestions?  Comments are love.

 

 

 

Oh dear, I feel like I'm neglecting this journal.  I only have two entries and I opened this, what, a year and a half ago. How exciting.

♥

Title: Superman Kryptonite
Author: kissestohold
Words: 1766
Warnings: Near-death experience.
Characters: Fuji, Yuuta
Summary: How Yuuta got his scar.
Disclaimer: Not mine.




Comments are love.

Well, hello everyone!

I've had this journal for awhile, made it at the promptings of a friend. However, right after I made it and before I could actually make a post, I had a fight with them and completely forgot about this journal. Lately though I've been lurking around this site and noticed how much fun the posters here have so I decided to re-open it. I don't know if I will fully grow out of my lurker-ness as I'm really shy, but I'll try.

Let's all be nice to each other, okay?